Christmas Blues? Here’s how to let them go.
Well, if you are reading this Christmas is likely just around the corner and my patients are often NOT looking forward to seeing their family during the holidays when they have fertility issues.
This can definitely be a difficult time for someone experiencing fertility issues. In the emails I receive each week I hear many stories about the challenges of going through Christmas having hoped for that one special present you both wanted and wishing it could even come a little early so you were able to make that announcement to your family.
The end of the year approaches and it can be challenging if you are not pregnant yet. But by now if you have read my tips all along you know that I might just have another way for you to look at this time of year.
Traditionally Christmas is a time of giving and receiving, a time of joy and new life but it is also a time for suffering for many, not just those with fertility issues.
Why do people suffer around Xmas? I think it’s because there are certain expectations the pop up around Christmas. People are supposed to be happy, they are supposed to be cheerful but when they take a look at their life and it’s not jolly or what they wanted it to be and they feel they lack more than the next person, they can spiral into a dark place at a time when peace on Earth is supposed to be talked about around the world.
Hopefully this Christmas you can find peace within yourself.
How do I suggest you do this? Here are a few ways.
- You can surrender.
What? Give up? What am I talking about?
The kind of surrender I am talking about is not about defeat, it’s not about giving up, trying or keeping yourself from doing whatever you can to be healthy enough physically and emotionally to create a life. The kind of surrender I am talking about is giving up the relentless pain and letting go of continually trying to fight what seems to be a never ending battle.
Relinquish the pain and suffering you are going through by trying to control the situation. Take a step back and TRUST yourself, your body and your partner. Remind yourself that no matter what happens you will be okay. You are okay, right now, exactly the way you are.
Surrender the destructive thoughts, the what if’s, the “what am I doing wrong?” and embrace your life as it is right now AND continue to create what you want by paying attention to what your body and mind need.
2) Put yourself first this Christmas
AND, AT THE SAME TIME, be there for others when needed.
Maybe even give a present to someone in need. I know it seems paradoxical. How can you put yourself first and be there for others as well?
You can put yourself first by giving yourself the best Christmas present that you could ever receive… ACCEPTANCE and LOVE. This will allow you to be present this holiday season with a full heart, not an empty aching one.
You may even choose to spend a quiet romantic Christmas with your partner and appreciate your relationship for what is it today. You may not have the luxury of being able to have that quiet romantic time together, but I hope that you can do number 3
3) Spend at least some time focusing on what you have right now, this Christmas.
If it’s not all that you want then next year continue to improve yourself and move toward what you want to create.
During the holidays, as difficult as it may be, remember to look at loved ones and friends who have children, babies or who are pregnant as a sign that the same thing may be coming closer to you. Hug those little ones and hold them close to your heart and tell yourself that you are ready to receive life as well.
Hopefully this time though when you do that it won’t seem like an uphill battle and the tears will truly be tears of joy because you have felt as though you have let go of the burden you have carried and now have a lighter load to move forward with into the New Year.
If the end of this year marks the end of your trying to have a child, as some people have shared with me through their email, then assure yourself that you have done all that you could and that you know your decision is the right one and you are not stopping out of frustration but stopping because you are ready to move on and feel okay about it.
For others however, you may not be done and want to continue to move toward creating a life or expanding your family. I suggest you make a New Years Resolution to work on building TRUST and ACCEPTANCE of who you are right now to then create an opportunity for the new life to come to you.
Make choices that are constructive for yourself and your relationship. Make choices that you know in your heart are what you want to do, instead of feeling forced into something because of “what if I don’t do this? This could have been the one,” etc. TRUST that in your heart you know what is best for you and that when you supply your heart with what it needs your body is more intelligent than you could ever give it credit for.
Give your body what it needs to help you produce a balanced state and optimal health.
And if you want more tips on how to handle relatives and what other people may say around Christmas that is less than cheerful to your ears, then check out the other fertility tip that I wrote titled “Handling Friends, Relatives and Strangers” as well as “Have You Been Avoiding Friends and Family?.”
And I sincerely hope that you do have a very Merry Christmas and a wonderful new year.
And please feel free to share your story with me about how you handled Christmas and made it a time of inner peace for you. You can send it to firstname.lastname@example.org.
I will reply personally to your story and please know that I appreciate whatever you share.
All the best
The information contained in this tip is under the copyright of Stacey Roberts and Positive Image Publishing.
Stacey The Baby Maker
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